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Marks on the Soul
"It means more to mark a soul, than to leave a scar on flesh,
as where fingers cannot touch, only hearts can..."
~Musashi~
Often we hear people discussing their marks. They wear their bruises, welts and cuts as badges of honor, ready to show them off to anyone who will look upon them. The web is full of pictures of body parts adorned with bruises, piercings, tattoos, welts, marking the wearer as owned, as a proud submissive, as a 'good' slave.
And yet, few focus on what to me is most important. Few focus on the eyes, the soul, the emotions that connect Dominant and submissive, Master and slave.
The marks that I wear on my soul are marks that will stay with me forever. They have become a part of me, a part of my growth, a part of my journey in life. They will never fade.
I think one reason for this is perhaps the difficulty in describing what one feels. There is little if anything that matches the sensations, the thoughts the feelings that are contained in the soul of a submissive.
How does one describe the overwhelming desire to please another?
How does one describe the need to be controlled and to obey, even when obeying is not the easy thing?
How does one explain that even when their mind aches, their heart hammers, the desire to close up, to run in fear of one's self, become so overwhelming a scream begins to form deep inside, that one turns to their Master, their Sensei, their O-sama, and finds comfort in the struggle, comfort in the strength of him?
How does one explain the freedom found in peeling the layers of a lifetime, opening like a flower, soft, sensitive, and even raw, and feeling SO safe in the opening?
How does one see these things you may ask. How can one see the emotions, the feelings? Impossible, right? No it is not impossible. They are visible. They are visible with the heart, the soul, the eyes even, if one chooses to look deep enough.
It is visible in the eyes of a submissive as she looks to her Master
with longing.
It is visible in the hushed whispers of a Dominant as he praises
his submissive.
It is visible in the stern voice of a Master as he chastises his slave.
It is visible in the touch of his hand on her shoulder,
when fear fills her eyes.
It is visible in the respect they show each other, themselves, and those around them.
And it is visible in the unselfish way the slave serves her Master, giving to him all that she can, and more when that is his pleasure.
The marks on the soul reside within. Some much more difficult to see than others. Wear them with honor. Cherish them. Display them proudly. Struggle to describe them if you must, but more importantly, simply feel them, surround yourself in them, and find freedom in them.
© 2001 Karen
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